Best Books for Christian Marriages

Marriage is one of the most sacred institutions God ever created. It was established in the Garden of Eden—not by man, but by God Himself. For any Christian couple desiring a fruitful, joyful, and lasting marriage, knowledge is essential. The Bible says, “My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge…” (Hosea 4:6). Many Christian marriages struggle not because of lack of love, but because of a lack of understanding. That’s why reading the best books for christian marriages is a wise and godly investment.

Christian marriages were never meant to follow worldly trends or cultural definitions. Instead, God has laid out a blueprint for how a husband and wife should love, lead, and live together. Doing marriage God’s way leads to peace, intimacy, and purpose. It builds homes where Christ is the center and love is sustained through every season of life.

One of the most comprehensive and practical books on Christian marriage today is Model Marriage by Bishop Dag Heward-Mills. This book is more than a guide—it is a manual rooted in Scripture, seasoned with experience, and full of wisdom for couples at every stage of marriage. Whether you’re engaged, newly married, or decades into the journey, this book will help you understand what God expects—and how to live it out.

Below are several key sections of Model Marriage, each offering profound insights to strengthen and transform your marriage.

The God-Type of Marriage

One of the foundational chapters in Model Marriage explains that there are different types of marriages, but the God-type of marriage is the only one Christians should desire. This kind of marriage is built on sacrifice, covenant, and divine order. It is not based on convenience, culture, or fleeting emotions. Instead, it mirrors the relationship between Christ and the Church (Ephesians 5:25).

In the book, Bishop Dag Heward-Mills writes that many couples unknowingly operate in contractual marriages—relationships based on performance and personal benefit. The God-type of marriage, however, is covenantal. It is binding, lifelong, and designed to reflect the unchanging love of God.

A key takeaway from this section is the understanding that marriage is ministry. The husband is the priest of the home, and the wife is a helper—not inferior, but complementary. When couples understand the roles God has ordained, confusion and power struggles are replaced by harmony and mutual respect.

The chapter also addresses the importance of building on the right foundation. Just like a house, a marriage built on emotions or physical attraction alone will collapse in times of stress. But when a marriage is built on Christ and obedience to His Word, it can withstand any storm.

This chapter challenges couples to reject worldly standards and pursue the kind of marriage that glorifies God and brings lasting joy.

Love in Marriage

Love is not just a feeling—it’s a decision, a commitment, and an action. In the “Love in Marriage” chapter, Model Marriage provides deep insight into the different types of love and how each one plays a role in a godly marriage.

Bishop Dag teaches on agape love, which is unconditional, selfless love. This is the kind of love that Jesus demonstrated, and it’s the love that must be the foundation of every Christian marriage. While eros (romantic love) and phileo (friendship love) are important, they are not enough to sustain a marriage long-term. Only agape can cover offenses, endure hardship, and keep giving when the emotions run dry.

One of the strengths of this chapter is its practical approach to loving your spouse. It highlights ways to express love daily—through kindness, thoughtfulness, forgiveness, and sacrifice. There’s also an emphasis on love languages and understanding how your spouse receives love.

What’s especially powerful is the reminder that love can be rekindled. Many couples think love fades and never returns. But the truth is, love is like a fire—it needs fuel. This section encourages couples to intentionally invest in their marriage and stir up love continually.

In short, this chapter doesn’t just define love—it shows you how to live it out, even in tough seasons.

Communication in Marriage | Best books for Christian Marriages

Communication is the lifeblood of any relationship, and in marriage, it’s essential. In Model Marriage, Bishop Dag explains that many marital problems are rooted in poor communication, not lack of love.

This chapter breaks down different types of communication, such as verbal, non-verbal, emotional, and spiritual. Couples are taught how to not only talk—but listen, understand, and respond with grace.

One of the standout teachings is the concept of “emotional speech” vs. “factual speech.” Men often speak factually, while women speak emotionally. Understanding this difference helps avoid unnecessary conflict and misinterpretation.

The chapter also covers timing and tone, two factors that greatly influence how a message is received. Learning to speak in love, even when correcting or confronting, is a key skill that strengthens trust and intimacy.

Also emphasized is the need for prayerful communication—talking to God together and about each other. When couples pray and seek God’s guidance in their conversations, they experience unity and peace.

This chapter encourages spouses to create safe spaces where they can share openly, without fear of judgment. It teaches that honesty must be married to humility for communication to thrive.

Introduction to Temperaments in Marriage

Understanding your spouse’s temperament can change everything in a marriage. In this section, Model Marriage introduces the four classic temperaments—choleric, sanguine, melancholic, and phlegmatic—and how they affect interactions in marriage.

Bishop Dag goes in-depth to describe the strengths and weaknesses of each temperament. For example, the choleric is a natural leader but can be bossy and impatient. The melancholic is deep and loyal but can struggle with moodiness. The sanguine brings energy and joy but may lack discipline. The phlegmatic is calm and consistent but may avoid confrontation.

The book helps couples identify their own temperament and that of their spouse, which leads to better understanding and empathy. Rather than fighting against differences, couples learn to appreciate how they complement each other.

This section is both eye-opening and empowering. Many couples feel frustrated simply because they don’t understand why their spouse acts or reacts a certain way. But with knowledge comes peace.

The key message here is that no temperament is perfect—but with the Holy Spirit, each one can be refined. Marriage isn’t about changing each other, but about accepting and growing together.

Problem Solving in Marriage

Every marriage faces problems. What matters most is how those problems are handled. In the “Problem Solving in Marriage” chapter, Model Marriage offers powerful tools for navigating conflict in a godly way.

The chapter begins by teaching that problems are not signs of failure, but opportunities to grow. Even strong marriages have disagreements. The difference is that healthy couples learn how to face them with love, patience, and prayer.

One of the key strategies discussed is identifying the root of the problem, not just the symptoms. For example, a fight about money might actually be about control or fear. Digging deeper prevents repetitive arguments.

Bishop Dag also teaches about the danger of silent treatment, bitterness, and unresolved offenses. These destroy intimacy and breed division. Instead, couples are encouraged to practice forgiveness and transparency.

There’s also a section on seeking godly counsel when issues become too difficult to handle alone. No shame should be attached to asking for help—wise counseling can save a struggling marriage.

The chapter ends with a call to pray together and work together. Marriage is not a battleground; it’s a team effort.

The Key of Acceptance

In one of the most healing sections of Model Marriage, Bishop Dag talks about the power of acceptance. No spouse is perfect. Every husband and wife comes with flaws, weaknesses, and quirks.

Acceptance means saying, “I see your flaws, but I choose to love you anyway.” This doesn’t mean we ignore sin or enable unhealthy behavior. But it does mean we stop trying to change our spouse into someone they’re not.

This chapter explores the difference between expectation and reality. Many marriages suffer because one or both spouses live in disappointment over unmet expectations. But when couples shift their focus from what’s lacking to what’s already good, peace and joy increase.

A powerful truth in this chapter is that acceptance opens the door to growth. People flourish in environments of love and safety. When a husband or wife feels fully loved and accepted, they are more willing to change and improve.

The book also teaches that acceptance must be mutual. Both partners need to feel seen and valued, not judged or compared.

This section reminds couples that Christ accepted us in our sin—how much more should we extend that same grace to our spouse?

Introduction to Sexual Happiness

Sex is not a taboo topic in Christian marriage—it is a gift from God! In this chapter, Bishop Dag deals with sexual happiness with honesty and biblical clarity.

The book emphasizes that sexual intimacy is vital for a thriving marriage. It is not just about physical pleasure but about emotional and spiritual bonding. A healthy sex life builds closeness, trust, and joy.

One key teaching is that sexual needs differ between men and women. Understanding and meeting those needs is an act of love and selflessness. The chapter encourages open and respectful communication about intimacy, helping couples avoid frustration and unmet desires.

There is also a strong warning against using sex as a tool for manipulation or punishment. Instead, couples are taught to approach intimacy with generosity and affection, keeping their marriage bed holy and happy.

The chapter concludes with a reminder that sexual happiness doesn’t happen automatically—it must be cultivated through love, patience, and mutual effort.

Conclusion

If you are looking for the best book on Christian marriage, look no further than Model Marriage by Bishop Dag Heward-Mills. It is biblically rich, deeply practical, and relevant for every stage of marriage. Alongside the Word of God, this book should be on every Christian couple’s bookshelf.

Marriage is a journey that requires learning, humility, and grace. But with the right tools and the right heart, you can build a marriage that not only lasts—but glorifies God.